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Archive for July 31st, 2007

Self Doubt

     Hey, i don’t know about you but i am discovering i don’t know myself as well as i thought i did.  I am normally confident that i know who i am and what i am all about.  What i am discovering is that underneath it all…i have a hidden tape recorder running in the background of my thought processes.  Whenever i am about to step out and tread on new ground…i somehow sabatoge myself with negative thinking. 

     Whoa, this is a very difficult thing to admit even to myself.  Who am i to think i could………….  add whatever new thing it is that you are about to attempt!  Before you know it…i am defeated before i even expend the energy to step up and try.  I wouldn’t let someone else stop me from doing what i want to do; so why do i  intimidate myself into not succeeding?  I don’t know…but ….i am going to work on it. 

     I don’t want to spend any more time in my life with regrets or with unfulfilled desires.  Fear can be a huge intimidator.  I know i let it keep me from lots of things.  I hate heights…so i dont fly…i don’t climb mountains…i don’t travel through the mountains (even though they are beautiful) unless i can do the driving…funny huh?  I miss out and i have no one to blame but myself.  I hate that …but do i hate it enough to try to change?  I hope so.

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