Hottie to Nottie

     Isn’t it sad to see someone who was once considered beautiful, sexy, popular and much sought after turned into an empty shell?  In other words a hottie turned into a nottie?  One of the big misconceptions that the media portrays on men and women is that all you have to do to be successful is to be attractive, popular and available.  If a person falls into that trap and doesn’t develop some deeper qualities and values in life…eventually, the emptiness turns a person into a sad, shell of a person who seeks attention in the only way they know how; displaying what they consider to be their only value…their body.

        You see this all of the time in the world of celebrities…but everyday people often fall into that trap as well.  Beauty, youth, and popularity all pass away in time…what’s left is the spirit, the mind, and their purpose in life.  If those aren’t developed along the way…the search for meaning is sometimes mis-directed onto meaningless relationships, trendy pseudo-religions, drugs/alcohol abuse, and endless dramatic attempts to seek attention. 

         As a society we need to devalue the attention that the media puts on empty pursuits by public role models.  We need to encourage those sports figures, politicians, and celebrities who are doing positive…purposeful things in life.  Quite giving time and attention to those who are living on the edge and doing nothing more with the gifts in their lives than pursuing selfish and destructive behaviors.  In raising our children, we need to develop character building, self esteem, and goals of reaching out to others. 

          We do this by teaching them to discover how to connect to others, give back to those who are less fortunate in life, teach them spiritual fulfillment, and to value their bodies by encouraging modesty and healthy self- esteem building techniques. 

           I dont like seeing young guys or gals flaunting their bodies or their finances to gain attention; I like it even less when i see a 40-60 year old who talks, acts, spends, and dresses like a teenager…because that is the only way they know to attract members of the opposite sex.   Let’s encourage an attitude of growth, respect, confidence, and personal development as a way of life!

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Feeling Someone’s Pain

       Have you ever talked with someone, in person or on the phone, and FELT the pain that they were going through?  Staying connected to those around us demands an attitude of awareness and compassion.  Having a relationship with others, that goes beyond the surface, requires time, attention, and sensitivity.  Are you able to feel someone else’s pain?

        Communicating comfort, love and caring towards others is easy.  All you have to do is reach out to them, for them to feel that love and caring.  Will they talk about their pain; it depends on whether they are ready or not.  Some people internalize what they are going through…they can’t share it until they have processed what they are struggling with.  Others unload their challenges at the drop of a hat. 

       The key to staying connected and being helpful to another person; is knowing that person well enough to know how they handle painful situations.  If they need someone to talk to when dealing with difficulties, try to be there for them.  If they need time to process what they are going through…make sure they know they can call on you when they are ready to talk it out. 

       Lately, it seems like there are too many news reports of people who have broken under stress or pain and have become desperate…hurting themselves or someone else that they professed to love.  It doesn’t have to be that way.  If everyone tried to be more aware of those around them…this world would be a better place.  Do you know someone who is hurting; or, is it you who is going through a hard time?

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A Nursing Mother Can’t Ignore A Hungry Baby-Salma Hayek

     If you were traveling through a poverty striken area and you had a baby of your own that you were still nursing…could you walk away from a hungry newborn baby that had nothing to eat?  Actress Salma Hayek was in Sierra Leone on a humanitarian mission…she nursed an African newborn who was starving because his mother could not produce milk for her child.  Salma was moved to feed that child.  She talked about his eyes lighting up as he began to feel the nutrition flow into his body.  She was moved in her heart to feed him; because i believe that a nursing mother can’t ignore a hungry baby that is crying out in his/her need;  that is called basic human compassion.  Still, you would think that we all had that in abundance; but, not always so, some would run the other way as quickly as they could go.

       This moment was captured on film by the news crew of  “Nightline”  who were along on the trip for Unicef , to promote the importance of tetanus vaccines.   Unicef and Pampers have a campaign called 1 Pack=1Vaccine; Salma is a spokeswoman for Pampers.  www.unicefusa.org or www.pampers.com/unicef 

         I love the message of what Salma did; purely from the standpoint of, if you see a need fill it.  Salma still is breastfeeding her own child who is approximately 1 year old.  She understands the importance of, the nutritional value as well as the bonding value of, breastfeeding. 

         Surely there will be those individuals who will criticize her for what she did.  There will be naysayers who will bring up the issue of aids and to the  possible exposure to her health or that of her own child.  They will say that she did this as a publicity stunt, or for the attention.  Some will say in the larger scheme of things…did that one feeding make a difference; will it save the life of that child.   I believe it made a difference.  I believe an African woman saw an American woman with heart.  I believe a baby felt fulfillment, comfort, and love.  I pray that the mother and child received more help.  A world saw a desperate moment and an act of love.

          I say, she was in the moment.  She saw a child in need; she felt the despair of a mother who could not provide for her child the most basic necessity in life at that time for her child; she did what she was able to do.  I love that she didn’t think twice.  Those who have been blessed in life and find themselves around others in need have a responsibility to share.  I respect Salma for doing it so very naturally.  There are so many in need around the world…what can you do to make a difference?

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She Might Have Just Saved Her Own Life-Drew Peterson’s Fiancee Moves Out!

     Christina Raines is the young woman who had recently moved in with her fiance, Drew Peterson.  Drew Peterson, if you will remember, is the former police officer who has been a suspect in the disappearance of his fourth wife and also was under suspicion in the death of his third wife.   Drew did an interview, with Martin Bashir of ABC’s news program Nightline, that aired on Thursday night.  Drew and Christina viewed the interview together, at which point…she allegedly called him a liar, broke up with him and moved out. 

     Everyone has been concerned for her safety and that of the well-being of her children, that moved in with her and Drew.  By moving out…she may have very well saved her life and her sanity from living in a fishbowl.  To listen to Drew tell it; he is addicted to new romances…what kind of a relationship can survive that, long term?  No woman wants to think she is just a number standing in line; to enjoy her turn at the romance department…only to be replaced by someone younger and more exciting; if real life gets in the way of the newness of their romance.

       I saw part of that interview, Drew comes across as trying to be very charismatic and at the same time…condescending.  He appears to like the attention of the public and he appears to like the fact that people fear/and are fascinated by him.   He made comments alluding to the fact that “young women are drawn” to him.  They seek him out he said and, even sometimes flirt with him or sit on his lap.  He tells the interviewer that he likes the attention of the young women…he likes falling in love.  Drew also said that when his relationships start to lose their excitement…that is when he is drawn to other women.  His relationships/marriages have failed in the past because of this.

       Christina’s father, Ernie Raines has been trying to enlist the help of the local police department, trying to make sure that his daughter and grandchildren are ok.  He made no secret of the fact that he does not trust Drew Peterson.  I think that many people can understand and support those feelings.  Ernie helped Christina move out…Drew did not want to let him in the house and Ernie had to once again call the police.  Good job Ernie for being persistant; if you feel your children are in danger…you do what you have to-to protect them.

     You have to wonder about the emotional well-being of Drew’s younger children that he had with Staci…his wife that is missing.  How must it be for them to be growing up in a home that is constantly watched and a place that must be under alot of stress because of that suspicion.  Not to mention…those children have been deprived of their mother…for whatever reason she is missing…they have suffered a great loss.

        In watching the interview, I felt repulsed listening to him go on and on about how much he enjoys the attentions of the young women that he meets and has met in the past (in bars).  It comes across to me as a young, immature male teen bragging on his conquests.  It all appears as a game…one that matches his wit and his ability to con those around him.  He was an undercover police officer for a 5 year period and  he allegedly made statements, in the past, about how he loved to see the faces of the people who were arrested once they found out that he was a police officer who conned them with his disquises.  The interview felt to me, like it was just another con job that floated his boat…one that tested his ability to still fool those that he wishes, with whatever story he chooses to tell.

        I say to Ernie Raines…enjoy your relationship with your daughter…spend time listening to her.  I hope that she is able to heal her heart and realize just how much better off she is away from the media circus that she was living in with her relationship with Drew Peterson.   At the same time, she might want to spend a little time in counseling trying to discover what it was about that relationship that made her feel like she was making a good decision for her future and that of her children.  Best of luck!  Women…where there is smoke there is fire…you can’t change a person that you are attracted to…you cant “fix” their problems…you can’t be all things to one person…and you can’t live with the shadow of missing wives, alleged murders, infidelities, and controlling behaviors; and live happily ever-after!

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Is Anyone Else Feeling A Rising Sense of Dread And Panic?

       With all of the economic shake ups taking place in the United States…i was just wondering…is anyone else feeling a rising, fearful sense of dread and panic?  It has building for the last year and a half with the mortgage crisis, rising costs of food, gasoline, home heating fuels, foreclosures, and job downsizings.  Now on top of all of that…we are seeing the fall of the major financial instutions in our country.

       Some Americans, in portions of our country, have been seeing and feeling the economic sense of dread and panic rising for quite some time.  It started with many job markets closing down or moving out of country (outsourcing) and then we started to see the domino effect from credit card lapses, missed mortgage payments, vehicle repossessions and then, foreclosures of homes that probably never should’ve been financed in the first place.  It has been, and continues to be, a chain reaction.

       The culture of over-indulgence, and pay later, mindset has decided to reveal it’s consequences.  There was no safety net in place to cushion the blow.  Once again in America, our quality of life is being threatened in a way that has the potential to bring our country to it’s knees; similar to the Great Depression that we all studied about in history class as children.  It has gone beyond a wake up call and moved to a place of drastic correction.  How are we going to deal with that as a nation?

      Tonight, President Bush is going to be speaking to the American citizens on the economic crisis that this country faces.  Minutes ago, Sen. John McCain made a statement saying that he is suspending his Presidential campaign to go to Washington to help deal with the historical financial crisis; McCain is calling on Sen. Barack Obama to put the campaign aside for the time being to focus on a bi-partisian solution.  Now is not the time for political game playing.  Anyone who dares go there…will loose the election for sure just because of it.  A commitment must be made to work on the issues that we are facing and stop playing word games and power plays to get attention.

        Time is of the essence at the moment; the impact has the potential to deconstruct the global economy.  Not only are our citizens watching and waiting to find a solution…other countries are doing the same.  Is there any possible way that we can as a nation and as individuals recover from this mess?

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A Life Worth Saving-National Suicide Prevention Week

      Anyone who has lost someone to death realizes just how precious life is.  Anyone who has lost someone, due to suicide, realizes what a waste of precious life, suicide is.  No one wants to talk about the horror of suicide; there is no way, to make the subject easy to discuss.  When the media does a story on suicide…it seems that there is an increase in suicides attempts that take place.  It is a careful balance to bring awareness to a terrible tragedy that affects so very many people; and yet, not give it so much attention that it plants seeds in the minds of those who are most vulnerable.  Here is a site that can shed some light on the subject:  http://www.suicidology.org/displaycommon.cfm?an=2

         This week is National Suicide Prevention Week.  It is important to bring the message of hope and restoration.  Hurting people need to have a reason to live; they need to know that someone cares and is listening to them.  Those same people need human intervention to help them when they are vulnerable.   It is crucial to educate the public on ways to observe and interact with individuals who are struggling in their life and may be at risk for a suicide attempt.  People experiencing loss, loneliness, physical or mental health problems, financial problems, depression or isolation are at risk.   Every life has value and is worth saving!  Won’t you take a few minutes to learn more?

        There is a team of committed people who are working very hard to educate and bring awareness to the public about the issue of suicide prevention.  The team is called Ken McArthur’s Impact Action Team; and they are trying to communicate the importance of teen suicide prevention.  Here is a glimpse into the combined efforts of the Impact Action Team : http://speakupsavelives.org/general/speak-up-save-lives-message-to-be-broadcast-live-to-15-million-people-wednesday-morning-at-730-am-on-comcast-cn8  Check out their message and their goals…witness the impact that individuals can have by joining together with like-minded people.  Have you been affected by suicide during your lifetime?  If you could do ONE thing to help prevent a suicide, what would it be?  Speak up…someone who needs to know could be listening! 

       

       

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Olympic Opportunities-Michael Phelps

          Do you remember in the old days when someone won gold in the Olympics; they maybe made the cover of a cereal box or got a television commercial?  These days, with all of the open access to micro media (social networking)…a savy person, or someone with the bucks to hire a  skilled publicist, has the whole world at their feet if they so choose.

           Michael Phelps must be either very savy with the micro media, or he has the bucks for the publicist :).  News came right away that he was going to be working on writing a book.   Keeping his name in the forefront of the media is a wise thing; it will help him to sell his book in large numbers; which publishers love!   He has done the traditional celebratory thing and went to Walt Disney World for a colorful photo op.  He has even been making the rounds in the traditional media mags like People who try to dig into his personal life…like the romance department. 

          Evidently, he has been in training for more than the Olympics as he learned somewhere how to evade direct responses to requests for said information on his love life, haha.  I say go for it Michael…it’s is no-ones business unless you choose to make it public knowledge.  Of course, that doesn’t stop the speculators who suggest that he is involved with a former beauty queen from California, by the name of Nicole Johnson.

           Michael Phelps is also keeping busy by expanding his skill set.  He is going to be on Saturday Night Live on Sept 13th.  It appears that Michael is going to avoid that typical emotional let down, that many feel after competing in the Olympics, when all of the attention shifts from the competitors and their accomplishments to other news of the day.  Smart move…it is never a pretty thing to see a role model who is accomplished, wither on the vine, not knowing what goals to set their sights on next.  Good luck Michael Phelps with your exploration of the world; you seem to be enjoying the experiences as you go, as you should!

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Oscar De La Hoya Suit Dropped Like a Hot Potato

         I am sure Oscar De La Hoya is breathing a little more deeply today; the defamation lawsuit against him by a stripper who had been showcasing pictures that seemed to show Oscar with a fishnet & high heel fetish has been dropped.  I remember seeing those pictures and thinking to myself…wow…if that were real it would ruin his boxing career in the macho sports world.  How embarassing for him.

         Oscar denied that the pictures were real.  The stripper, Milana Dravnel still said that they were in fact real.  She was on television showing the pictures.  Again, Oscar said the pictures were fake and had been doctored.  If they were fake…why would she claim otherwise when it could be proven differently…money, attention, passion,  a need to humiliate him for revenge for a broken heart? Did they have a relationship that went badly?   Who knows!

        When Oscar stood his ground…Ms. Dravnel then filed the lawsuit claiming that he defamed her.  After an expert backed up Oscar De La Hoya…Ms. Dravel allegedly admitted it.

         The question is…what was her motivation, if in fact the pictures were doctored?  And if they were doctored…why did it take her from last fall, when she admitted it; until now to drop the lawsuit?   Hmmmm, many questions…not as many answers for those who would like to know.

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