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Posts Tagged ‘control’

      Ok, we all know that illegal drugs are bad for you…understanding that, starts in elementary school when children become educated about such risky behavior.  However, world cultures send mixed messaged to young children through the behavior of the adults that they interact with in their lives; and, through exposure on television and in various forms of media.  Television often glamourizes the lifestyle of the drug trade.  It shows all that it has to offer with money, celebrities, music, expensive house & cars & jewelry and loads of boyfriends/girlfriends…what it doesn’t always address is the danger, the moral/spiritual decay, suicide, murder, prostitution, the dehumanizing treatment of families, and the lack of control of how far they end up sliding into despair.

       So, not only do we understand the damage that can come from the abuse of drugs…such as death, brain damage, broken relationships, jail/prison, rotted teeth, damaged health, addiction, prostitution, theft, and many other physical ailments…but we begin to see a moral decay as well.  People appear to have very little value to the drug addicts; and or, the people who supply them with the drugs.

      This week a very disturbing story made the news about a young boy, from Las Vegas-Nevada, who was forcibly taken from his home by people posing as police officers.  They  tied up the young boy’s mother and her boyfriend, ransacked the home, and took the six year old boy named, Cole Puffinburger.  The reports are that the boy was kidnapped out of some kind of retailiation; allegedly involving, (unknown to us), relatives of the boy and a drug deal.   Parents lose custody of their children everyday because of their relationships with drugs or alcohol.  But in this case, the people removing young Cole were NOT protective services…it is probably, people involved in the drug trade.  No one appears to know whether Cole is safe or not at this time.  If you have any information please call the Las Vegas Metro Police at:  702-828-5678Update:  Cole’s grandfather has been arrested on Friday night by U.S. Marshalls.  It is believed that he has been laundering money for Mexican Nationals involved in the drug trade.  The Grandfather has been hiding out.  It is being alledged that he owes the Mexican drug cartel, between 8-20 million dollars.  Pray for Cole’s safe return…hopefully, the grandfather will have information that will lead to finding Cole (alive and well).  Abductions are taking place more often near the Mexican boarder.  This is a national problem that we need to address…pray for the DEA who try to fight the good fight…pray that those who are tempted to go to the other side, stay strong!

       It is frightening and sad how little value is placed on human life anymore.  This poor young boy was put in harms way because of drugs; and or the buying/selling drug lifestyle.  Is this little boy going to be alright?  His playmate chums in the neighborhood and in school are worried about him…they are frightened.  Whether it was the relatives that Cole lived with or others that were involved in his life…this child has been placed in danger due to the direct actions of people who he trusted; if the news reports we are hearing are true.

        Children all around the world are impacted by the choices their caregivers make.  Those caregivers (parents) who use illegal drugs or alcohol aren’t making rational decisions, oftentimes, because their thought processes are impared by the drugs/alcohol. 

        Please say a prayer for Cole, his friends and family (i am sure there are other family members who weren’t involved in the drug deal who care for Cole); as well as all children who’s lives have been impacted by the destruction that comes from the relationship of drugs/alcohol in their environment.  Have you or someone that you cared deeply about been affected by destruction associated with this kind of lifestyle?

        You’ve heard the saying that people who abuse drugs or alcohol say to back off…because it is their life; the thing is…that drug abuse affects us all.  It starts with each individual choice to use or not to use.  They often think that they are in control of the drugs or alcohol…but, it doesn’t take long for that to shift…and the drugs or alcohol are controlling them…and affecting everyone around them.  It is a big business with high stakes…people get involved in things that they can not control.  www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/drugs/  

Update on Saturday October 18th, 2008…it appears that the authorities have suddenly pulled the amber alert that was put out for young Cole.  There has been no further information.  There is supposed to be a news conference this afternoon.  As soon as there is updated information released…i will add it to this page. 

New update:  Cole has been found walking alone on the streets while detectives were handing out flyers about him.  Thank you God…thank you to the volunteers…and thank you to those who prayed for his safe return.  There were no further details given.

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        Bravery is doing things you don’t want to do, facing things you don’t want to face, feeling things you don’t want to feel, taking a risk, acknowledging that you aren’t in control of all things related to you and yet, putting one foot in front of the other, regardless.

         Being brave doesn’t just apply to the larger things in life that we all have to deal with…bravery is applying the aforementioned things to the everyday, mundane events that take place in our lives and not giving up! 

          In both big and small moments we are brave…sometimes we are timid; that is ok.  Life is all about support and knowing where to get it when you need it.  You don’t have to be brave alone.  🙂  Was today a timid day or was it a test of bravery?  Big moment or small?  Did you reach out for support when you needed it?  Your timid day might be someone else’s brave day and tomorrow might be your day of bravery!  In the area of encouragement…be a giver and a taker…life will open up to you when you do so.

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        There is something to be said for being a part of the middle class…without any of  the demands expected of the rich and famous.  Have you ever stopped to think about what your life would be like if you were one of those celebrity names in the tabloids?  Every family has issues in their family tree with some relative or another. 

        Think about it…what if cousin Ralph committed a crime and was photographed for a magazine, making sure to give an interview which made a connection between his name and your’s in the article; or, your sister decided to become a singer (and she howled like your neighbor’s hunting dog) but still, she badgered your professional contacts to try to get an audition; or say, your Grandma decided to go on a talk show and talk about her sex life before she married Grandpa?  Maybe your father wants to write a best seller that very closely resembles your life pre-celeb days? Or a relative goes on a large shopping spree that they can’t possibly afford to pay for on their own?   How would you handle it?

         In today’s world, with everyone having access to so much digital information…if you are a celebrity, and the media decides to do a little digging…they are sure to find some family member, friend from the past, or ex-boyfriend/girlfriend who is more than ready, willing and able to spill the beans for a little $$$.  What’s more…you don’t even have to wait for the media to find those who are willing to spill the beans for a fee…your relatives can go viral just by publishing a blog.

          You don’t have to look far to see examples of what I am talking about.  After all, there are painful family issues that allegedly haven’t been able to be resolved in private, such as families like the Lohans who make the news regularily, with custody battles, blog posts, or writting letters to media outlets criticizing one another; rehashing the past and the present family problems.  These issues are deeply personal and have the ability to cause life long discord with in a family unit.  

           Then you have the media’s flavor of the month, the Spears family.  Either they focus on the latest exploits of Brit, Jamie Lynn, her mother, father or ex-husbands and boyfriends or they hint at some kind of rumor that vaguely resembles a sliver of truth and wait to see the fireworks.  You can understand the potential added damage done to an individual when there is intensive media scrutiny focussed on them. There is enough family drama in most families, without having to create an intense watch and see environment.

           What about family members who stay in the background until they have shopped around the possibility of writing a tell all book…like Oprah’s father, allegedly considered doing?  Or a little less reclusive personality, such as…Madonna’s brother, Christopher Ciccone who actually did write a book recently, detailing his complicated relationship with his sister.  Remember many years ago, the explosive book called Mommy Dearest, written by Joan Crawford’s daughter about her very famous mother?

           We’ve all seen that the tabloids will exploit a family member’s run- in with the law.  Or, maybe a business owner or individual who slaps a lawsuit on a family member of a celeb, knowing that it will get settled because of the negative PR.   A recent example of a legal situation was when Hulk Hogan’s son was sent to jail for allegedly being the driver in an accident that seriously injured one of his friends.  All the while, his family was going through a seperation/divorce and the media attention only added to their personal difficulties.  This fed the flames of many articles and celebrity gossip shows for many weeks.

            There is never a lack of divorce related stories or custody issues either.  We have come to know more about certain star crossed couples, and their problems, than we need to know; think of Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards, or Kim Basinger and Alec Baldwin, Pamela Anderson and any of her exes.  In these cases, many times the courts are often at fault for allowing legal records to become released to the public through the media; that is why you occasionally hear of circumstances where divorcing couples use a private mediator to settle their marriage issues.  Sometimes it is through individuals or their family members that we learn what is often harmful to the well-being of the couples or their children.  I am sure in the long run they come to regret the fact that so much private information has become public knowledge. 

            What about those situations where family members are estranged from one another and they use the media to communicate with each other about family issues.  I think about in that case, Angelina Jolie and her father.  Or, maybe Kellie Pickler who had a difficult relationship with her estranged birth mother.   Or Jennifer Anniston and her mother who allegedly became estranged, from one another, over too much personal information being given out. 

           Some celebrities don’t publically acknowledge their family problems…others confront them head on.  Which way is most effective for them, sort of depends on why the violations take place in the first place.  Some celebs feel that they must go public and defend themselves and others…keep a quiet counsel and deal with things privately.  It is not easy either way.  The power of criticism is strong…and you can’t please everyone, no matter what action a celebrity chooses to employ to deal with the fallout. 

           Regardless of celebrity status…it is helpful to remember that those people are human beings with feelings too.  They have relationships that can be damaged, and, they are often afforded little privacy as it is.  You would think that their family members would have a little bit of loyalty and a desire to keep some issues private; and, not turn their private relationships into some sort of pay- per- view.  But often, these situations aren’t JUST about money.  Sometimes, the interviews and books are written out of more complex issues; such as, unresolved issues involving trust, envy, control, anger, betrayal, neglect, abandonment or favoritism.  So when you see one of these interviews or books; remember that it might be more about getting even, than it is about getting rich!

           Certainly, the people who publish the reports, interviews, books, and celeb gossip programs aren’t going to keep potentially scandulous information to themselves; not when it is their bread and butter.  So think about that, the next time you purchase one of the tabloids, weekly celeb mags, tune in to the gossip programs, or purchase the latest personal memoir about someone famous; you are enabling them to sell out their own family members.  What if your friends or relatives did that to you?  What kind of tales could they tell about you to allow them to make money off from you or your past?

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      News today was announced that Britney Spears and her ex-mate, Kevin Federline have agreed to a custody agreement that is going before the court, for a judge’s signature to become official.  Kevin Federline will get sole custody of the two boys that he and Britney had together; Jayden James and his older brother Sean Preston, once that document is signed by court officials.  (more…)

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        We are all born into circumstances that we have absolutely no control over.  The best that you can hope for is to maximize the positive and to minimize the negative events, circumstances or experiences.  All of those things, both positive and negative, help to shape us into the person that we become.

        If we start to experience problems in our relationships at work, home, school, or on a personal level with someone special; often, we will discover at the root of the issue, are things left over from our very beginnings in life that are unresolved or unhealed.  When the past threatens to destroy your future you must take time to figure it out; for your well-being and for those who care about you.

        Understanding what the problem is and where it comes from is a turning point.  Don’t get stuck there with excuses why your life isn’t turning out the way you want it to…you don’t have to continue to be held hostage by the past!   (more…)

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       Well, this morning there is breaking news that oil production is not keeping up with the demand for oil…this is a surprise to people; just now?  Come on…with the price of gasoline rising every week…how could they miss something this big?  Most of us commononers have it figured out already.  We need it…they have it…we pay for it…they profit from it…Simple right?  Well, not so much…you see we don’t have to be as dependent on foreign oil as we have been.  Smart people are looking at ways of altering their lifestyle to save money and make greener choices in their energy usuage.

           I say, smart people are trying to take back some control in their lives.  Everyone is trying to figure out, in their own way, what choices in their day- to- day activities they can make, that will cut down on their usage of gasoline and oil.  For some, it isn’t just about saving money…although that too is important…it is understanding that the plentiful supply of oil is not always going to be there.  We need to figure out alternative ways of heating our homes and businesses; as well as, getting around where we need to go. 

        I saw a newspiece the other day on television about how many more people are taking advantage of public transportation; regardless of their financial status.  It seems that the subway systems in some cities are overflowing with riders, busses are experiencing an increase as well.  Around the world where people have the option of using ferries, trolleys or railways, we are seeing more people access public transportation in numbers large enough to measure.  This is good, people are making smarter choices.

          Some great minds are working on designing alternative ways of producing and using solar energy, steam powered products, water powered generators, geo-thermal systems, wind powered generators…we need to look at all of these renewable sources in a serious way.  It is important to encourage people to make small sacrifices now to prevent huge sacrifices later.  Educating others about the dangers of being so dependent on oil as our only source of energy is very important. 

         Some celebrities are wise about leading the call to understanding the importance of changing our ways.  Brad Pitt is into architecture and design and can influence greener choices in his building projects; Leonardo DiCaprio is not only a strong voice; but, is active in his desire to educate others about the importance of respecting our earth, and it’s resources.  There are other celebrities who are encouraging hybrid cars as a way to make a difference.  Being an environmental activist is something we should all take on like Leonardo DiCaprio; here is his website to help educate others to the idea of protecting our environment. www.leonardodicaprio.org/

         Back to the breaking news part of things…today it was announced by Saudi King Abdullah that his country is increasing oil production.  The Saudi’s are going to put out 9.7 million barrels of oil a day instead of the past 9 million barrels.  That is good and maybe it will help with the high prices a bit.   

           Higher production is good and may help temporarily…but again, realizing that we do have choices that can also make an impact on our finances and on our planet is a powerful idea that needs to take root in more people’s minds.  Our future is at stake and the quality of our lives will be impacted by the choices we all make today & tomorrow.  We can no longer be in denial about the condition of our earth.  We have the power to affect positive change by our actions.  How is your life being affected by high gasoline and oil prices?  How have you had to change your lifestyle?  What smart choices have you chosen to make?

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         A new way of collecting physical evidence in rape cases is making news.  It seems that many rape victims are leaving the medical setting; rather than, face another trauma of talking to; or, being interviewed by police after being raped.  They are too frightened in some cases of dealing with the police; some are fearful of talking to police for a variety of reasons such as possible drug/alcohol use at the time of the attack.  Many victims are worried about revenge violence for reporting the assault.  Some of the victims are young and don’t want their friends/parents/or significant other to find out.  Some rape victims just can’t deal with one more thing, that is out of their own personal control.

           So, the newly titled, Jane Doe rape kits are being offered; the evidence is collected by a specially trained nurse/doctor; and no name is put on the sealed envelopes…only an identifying number.  This way, when and if, the victim is ready to file a police report the evidence is still available.

           States are going to be required to offer the Jane Doe kits starting in 2009.  The kits are expensive; about $800.00.   It will be left up to the states which locations will have the kits available.  This way of collecting evidence just may improve the reporting of rape crimes.  In 2006, before the Jane Doe kits have become more commonly, available…it has been estimated that less than half of all rapes have been reported.  That also means that victims who may have been exposed to Sexually Transmitted Diseases aren’t being tested or treated.  Pregnancies can occur if too much time passes without medical care and of course, unless they seek it out, oftentimes, counseling or support services aren’t offered because the medical/legal profession would not be notified of the attack.  The Jane Doe kits have some definate positives…but what about other issues?

          Some of my questions would be…how long does the evidence, kept in storage, last?  How long would a victim have, before that evidence was no longer viable? The physical evidence and the photo’s collected at the time, in the Jane Doe kits, would still be helpful…but, what about a victim’s documented memories? 

         Would a legal team be able to tear apart a victims testimony in court; if, some extended time passed before a police report was made and documented?  Would their testimony of events be questioned due to a time lapse between the actual rape, identification and prosecution of a suspect?   Could the questioning of a victim’s memories of the rape be called into question; giving the legal representatives an edge in getting the charges of the suspect dismissed?  These are all important questions, as it would be horrible to go through such an experience; only to have it all dismissed, after summoning up the courage to actually file a report and go through the legal process.

         What do you think about the Jane Doe kits for rape victims?  Do you feel they will be helpful or harmful to prosecuting a case against a suspect? 

        

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        Josef Fritzl aged 73 is supposedly, “an emotionally broken man”, according to his  lawyer, Rudolf Mayer.  Josef came to be known to the world, last week, as the twisted father from Austria.   He admitted to imprisoning his 18 year old daughter for 24 years so that he could sexually assault her; in his specially designed dungeon, in secret rooms, underneath the home that he shared with his daughter Elisabeth’s mother.

         The man allegedly kept his daughter on a leash like an animal in that basement for the first nine months or so.  Then, over the 24 years, he fathered 7 children with her.  One of those children died days after birth and he put it’s body into the furnace.  He “allowed”  3 of the children to be raised by himself and the grandmother; she believed her daughter ran off to join a cult when she was 18 and couldn’t care for the children.

         The man was convicted of raping another woman when Elisabeth was about to be born.  He served time for that offense about 18 months.  After that time…he had been planning this dungeon with evil intent.

          The lawyer claims that Josef is an emotionally broken man…and many would say, why should we care?  We should care because this man is someone who could be studied to deconstruct the mind of someone so hideously mis-wired as to do this kind of harm to his own flesh and blood.  We can learn alot from the workings of his mind; so that we could hopefully prevent this kind of tragedy from ever happening to another human being.

         If they let this man off from serving the rest of his days in a prison somewhere because of his “brokeness” then, there is no justice.  He has destroyed the lives of so many people.  Elisabeth and her children will forever struggle just to heal from this scarring of their minds and bodies.  Josef does not deserve to live out his remaining time on earth in a mental hospital. 

         We should care that he is broken only out of respect for those lives that he tried to destroy and control.  They deserve to know that he is serving his time in a prison that he cannot escape from…just as he sentenced them when he was in control.   I pray that somehow…they are able to heal enough to have some joy in life. 

         I must say that i am inspired by Elisabeth’s courage to survive all of those years.  To care for her children the best that she could.  Even now, she helped the authorities by going back into that place where he kept her imprisoned to help them to know more about this horror she lived for 24 years.  May God bless her and the family.

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      I am going to attempt to describe for you a temptation that is beyond my control.  Ok…i know i am not supposed to crave this thing…but, what can i say…i have such a wonderful imagination that i can actually see, smell, and actually, almost taste it.  What is this creation of temptation…why, it is cheesecake of course!

        Now, although cheesecake made from a box mixture is good (darn good most of the time); it is nothing compared to the costly, made from scratch with real, fat provoking ingredients.

        When you make cheesecake…you can do the right thing health-wise and use healthier ingredients such as fat free cream cheese and the yolk free eggs; but, really and truly…if you are going to cross the line and have cheesecake anyway…don’t you want to go all of the way and truly indulge in the full out sinfully good dessert?  I know I do.

       Real cheesecake made with the full fat cream cheese is a rich textured dessert.  It is heavy and creamy with just a touch of a tangy taste.  It is sweet; and slowly, melts in your mouth if you take the time to truly savor it’s richness.  I have to admit…there are degrees of goodness when you enjoy the temptation of such a fine dessert.

       I am diplomatic of course…i love them all.  Whether it be a lemon twist, plain cheesecake; or, covering the tartness of that, with a full out sweet fruit glaze such as strawberry or blueberry you can’t go wrong.  However, if you really want to feel guilty; i suggest something more exotic.

         I personally, think you should commit totally to your decision to cross the line of healthy eating and, just go for the gusto.  Choose a decadent chocolate cheesecake on a dark chocolate oreo base. Maybe add some fresh strawberries or cherries.  Add a couple of shaved, chocolate candy curls for decoration purposes only (who are we fooling?).  

        Drizzle some topping, the kind meant for those choosing to wallow in syrupy goodness, such as caramel or a rich, chocolate fudge syrup to form a pool around the base of the wedge of cheesecake; it makes it look like Martha Stewart is serving it.   Don’t cheat yourself and slice a skinny wedge…you KNOW you will just go back and have seconds if you DO; don’t ya?  🙂   That would make you look a little greedy…plus, this way…there is more than enough to leave a small portion on your plate; giving the illusion that you just couldn’t POSSIBLY eat it all….you know like the skinny model type women do when they go out to eat together!  🙂  It’ll be our little secret, LOL

        At this point, you have gone three quarters of the way into your decision to depart from a sensible diet.  If you are going to feel guilty anyway…why not take it to the limit?  Dig out the whipped cream and some cashews or peanuts  (if you want to claim a healthier nut additon…choose almonds or walnuts) and sprinkle them on top of your creation.  Congratulations…you have created a temptation worth diving into!  You might just be willing to give up a meal for this creation, don’t ya think?

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       Reportedly, Britney Spear’s family has alledged in court documents, that Britney’s svengali of  recent times, manager Sam Lutfi has drugged her and threatened both her and her family with violence.  Some of the alledged things that have been said,  have such open contempt in them that it is nothing less than malicious in an attempt to destroy Britney’s whole world.

        It sounds as if there must be some type of proof as the allegations have been submitted to the court and the court has  issued a temporary restraining order against him regarding contact with Britney and her home.  Without proof, a person submitting to the court false allegations would be held accountable.

        There have also been reports that Britney’s home has been burgularized.  All of these things all rolled into one huge circus; is it any wonder why Britney has been so very out of control of late?  Maybe alot of it has been without her knowledge or consent.  It is like something out of a soap opera…too wild to even contemplate.

        With all of the rumors of the media being notified of Britney’s comings and goings; even before they happened over the last few months…a sane person would wonder who would notify the media when it was so obviously not always something Britney wanted in her life.

        Maybe someone with an ulterior motive for all of the press coverage and a need to be seen in the public eye on the arm of one of the most infamous women of our time.  A woman in need of someone to control her environment and to keep her in  desperate, constant need.   Does this whole situation bring to mind another very famous woman; a woman who also lived in a state of upheaval until she was destroyed…Marilyn Monroe. 

        It will be up to the court and the medical profession to put all of the pieces of the puzzle together to get to the bottom of this cesspool.  Maybe, just maybe, the medical intervention will have happened in the nick of time to prevent even more diaster in the lives of Ms. Spears and her family.  If any of it is true , then it is more than sad, it is evil.

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