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Posts Tagged ‘doubt’

        I don’t know about you…but, doing something new is more than a little bit scary.  I don’t know if you are like this or not…but sometimes, I stop myself from doing things just because I get a little bit intimidated or fearful.  I also had a slight case of a fear of failure…and even worse…a fear of success!  Yep, I am definately my own worse enemy at times.  How many things in life do i miss out on, because the voice in my head has cautioned me to step lightly or turn around and go back to the same old status quo; just because it feels familiar and safe?  How many times have I cheated myself out of something wonderful and positive?

         Geez, I just bet I can’t count that high, LOL.   I think about this blog in particular…when I was moved in my soul to start disciplining myself and write on a regular basis; I knew it was something that I needed to do.  Yet, can you believe I almost talked myself out of it? 

           If I had allowed myself to continue to doubt…then, I would not have had the pleasure of helping supply information to so many people about triple negative breast cancer and have had the impact on lives that had not heard about the disease.  There were people who contacted me on that subject who were going through scary times and needed support.  There were other readers who had experience with TNBC and were able to be a support to others, through my blog.  Then, a subject i hold near and dear to my heart which is fetal alcohol spectrum disorders has had an impact on lives because of the information in that post.  I consider it an honor to have the priviledge to  possibly steer someone away from picking up an alcoholic beverage while pregnant; and maybe, preventing someone’s child from having a lifetime of disabilities that could have been avoided.  That is the power of positive impact.

           That very first post was so very intimidating that I sat and worked on it for hours…hours I tell you!  🙂  Finally, i confessed that it was intimidating and just jumped in with both feet and did it.  Scary, yes…am I glad that I took the chance and have since been blessed by the experience…YES!

            Tonight, I did something else that I wasn’t sure I could do.  I got on a live tele-seminar and spoke with businessman Michael Penland.  He had more than 100 people on that call, listening to his guests speak.  You can hear a replay of that call here:  http://instantteleseminar.com/?eventid=3926631   The listeners on that call were hungry for information on how to build their businesses and their websites; so that their dreams can come true.  Sometimes, it just takes a little encouragement for people to believe in themselves.  

            Michael is a special person who goes out of his way to help others succeed in their own businesses.  He helped my husband get started in marketing over a year and a half ago.  He helped to build my husband’s confidence and opened new doors for him.  Now my husband is a respected marketer who has helped to encourage and mentor so very many others in ways that have changed their lives for the better.   It is like a chain reaction when people set out to make a positive impact on the lives of others.

            Michael has a live seminar coming up in Orlando, Florida on Sept 19th-21st.  Check him out and see what he can do for you!  http://www.instantcashmarketing.com/jeff.html   The speakers at this event are powerful and have the skill to teach you how to achieve your dreams in a way that will open your eyes to the talents and skills you already own inside of yourself.  You may recognize some of the marketers by name, there is Willie Crawford, Matt Bacak, Brad Fallon, Dr. Mike Woo Ming, Howie Schwartz, Joe Sugarman, Debra Thompson, Jason Pearson, Frank Garon, Keith Wellman, Jeff Wellman, Dale Calvert, Alan Bechtold, Drew Miles, and Jeff Herring and of course, Michael Penland.  

            The title of the seminar is Magic 17-Billion Dollar Marketing Dream Team.  You will learn things at this live event that you may never have another opportunity to experience.  Do yourself a favor and click on this link and see how you can get yourself going in the right direction.  Empower yourself to do what you have always wanted to do; you can do it if you only dare, to not be intimidated or doubt yourself; I know you can!  http://www.instantcashmarketing.com/jeff.html

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        Have you ever been in a situation where you were won over to another person’s opinion…allowing them to convince you to their way of thinking?  Maybe your original opinion was wrong in the first place; but if not, how were they able to change your mind; have you ever wondered?

         Of course, most of us have an opinion about the things that go  on around us.  Have you ever found yourself in the position of having catapulted over to another person’s way of doing things; when you really wanted to do them differently in the first place?  Why did you allow their will to trump your own?  Was their way of doing things better…or were they just more persuasive?

          It is an interesting thing to think about.  Did you give more value to their opinion than your own?  What convinced you that they were right, and your thoughts or opinions were less right?  Often it is persistent persuasion, combined with perceived superior credibility.  You know your own faults and mistakes…but, you do not know those of the other person quite as readily; giving them the advantage of a certain level of confidence, that you do not automatically give your own opinion. 

          If you are a person that often feels resentment because others seem to get their way; and, your way is often not the chosen path; you need to think about why that happens.  Do you express yourself well?  Do you listen to all of the facts respectfully and then verbalize your opinion in a fair way, with a pleasant tone of voice?  Are you easily led by the firm voice of others, into doubting your own opinion?  These are issues that are important to the daily bump and grind in life, business, families and organizations. 

         If you tend to err on the side of giving more weight to the opinions of others, you need to evaluate where that comes from.   Knowing what you think and believe; and understanding why you hold those opinions, is key.  If you firmly believe that you are in the right, your opinion can be backed up with facts or figures; and, you learn how to present your voice in a confident and respectful way…others will listen.  Present the large and small picture, put things in perspective, use examples that re-inforce your beliefs, validate your opinion with evidence or a precedence that will apply to the situation.

         Sometimes it is important to find common ground where both sides of a discussion or issue can be met.  From that point on, listening is very important.  Listen to the other side of the issue or discussion before stating your opinion.   When you do express yourself, do it in a manner that is open to some give and take; or, compromise.  People who become entrenched in getting their own way, simply for the sake of getting their own way…often don’t. 

         If common ground can be achieved and there are degrees to which an issue can be decided…you have a better chance of convincing others to agree to your way of thinking.  If you can convince one or two other people to agree with you…often, you will start to see a shift in the direction of a group.  Persuading another person or two, begins to show validity to your way of thinking.  Some people may still personally hold a different opinion privately; but, what starts to happen is, that they are persuaded to hold an opinion that is influenced by the majority opinion.  This is effective impact.

         Often, you will see an organization or business use a celebrity or a powerful person who already has credibility in a certain area to give a testimony.  This is also called social proof…that is, harnessing that person’s value as a spokesperson because their opinion has valuable impact that can influence others.  If a group, business, or organization gets a famous person who shares their passionate message to endorse them…they are more likely to persade others or inspire them to their believe their message. 

         That is powerful, and that is why you see advertisers using the most famous powerful person that they can get on their public relations team; you even see it in politics.  Think about recent developments with Sen. Barack Obama…whether you believe in his ability to lead or not…you certainly have seen the star power that has been attached to his campaign.  There have been many celebrities who have given their “testimony” about their belief that he should be President…in fact, media analysts have given mention in the news to the Oprah factor regarding his campaign.  Oprah’s opinions carry alot of weight with some voters…she brings alot of persuasion to the table.

         Influencing a group in this way, needs to be done in a way that is ethical and honest.  Forcing others to your way of thinking can backfire and cause great harm if you are malicious minded.  Think of those who use gossip or rumor to negatively affect persons, or groups of people.  No one wins in that situation and bad feelings are created; leaving everyone involved with a negative impression.

         If you use the process of persuasion…and you are doing it in an ethical way…you will start to find that people will gravitate towards supporting your business, issue, or organization.  Being persistent in stating your opinion or issue is important to getting others to support that issue.  The more people who are pursuaded or convinced, the more that word of mouth spreads the opinion, it becomes viral; and, it becomes more credible to those who have not heard it, or been previously convinced. 

          If your goal of persuasion is to get people to take action…then effective persuasion is a must.  Ken McArthur’s Impact Boot Camp Action Team has spent the weekend learning how to use their impact to get people to take action and to be effective in their collective powers of persuasion.  These team members include people like Jeff Wellman who made a splash in the internet marketing world in the last year or so.  They were exposed to experts in many areas of impact such as publishing, media, social networking and so on.  Author Brendon Burchard, who also gives inspiring advice to businesses and non-profit organizations, was present. 

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       Have you ever known someone who is in a totally disfunctional relationship and just seems destined to repeat patterns of negative and destructive behaviors?  I was thinking on this last night with a young teenaged couple that i know.  They spend all of their time together…fighting…hurting…crying…begging…breaking up…for-giving….manipulating…emotional arm wrestling…isolating…and starting all over again.  They are on the phone…or in person…tuning everyone else out..until they self-destruct.  Then, the explosion, they want everyone to feel their pain.  When counseled…all they can think about is “fixing it” and getting back together.  They get back together all right…but nothing ever gets fixed.  It is an emotional war that definately takes prisoners.

        Then today, someone else that i care about deeply…has decided to once again go up for a heaping dose of all you can eat at the salad bar of pain and abuse.  Taking a little taste of negativity, nibbling on a chunk of guilt large enough to choke a horse, a dip of put downs and innuendo, a spoonful of diced self esteem, add a sprinkling of despair, a serving sized dollop of loneliness, add a slice of isolation, a bowl of anger, and lets not forget a huge serving of accusation.  Hey, you’ve already paid the price…there is no limitation on how much you can have…it is there if you only want more.  (more…)

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