Enabling Or Supporting The Mother Of Octuplets

       Surely you have heard the news about the mother in California who gave birth to eight babies this past week; she already has six children; they are all under the age of 8.  The mother, Nadya Suleman, conceived all of her children by invitro fertilization.  She is unemployed and living in a three bedroom home with her parents.  There are so many questions about how an educated woman, could allow herself to get in this position of having 14 children with little or no support.  Many are questioning the ethics involved in allowing a single woman with 6 children and no job to get invitro fertilization in the first place; let alone, get implanted with 8 embryos.

         Part of the conflict is that people are wondering how did she come up with the money for the invitro for any of her pregnancies?  That is not cheap…let alone to have it done so many times.  Also, it is not normal procedure to implant so many embryos for one pregnancy.  Even when 4 or so embryos are implanted…it isn’t expected that all would become viable babies.  That is amazing in itself that all 8 would be viable and born.

        Now, the woman is living in a home with her parents with only three bedrooms.  There are already 6 children in the home.  Where will these babies live when they come home?  Nadya’s father is a contractor who works overseas and probably wont be around to help and the media has been reporting that Nadya’s mother is threatening to leave the home when her daughter comes home from the hospital.  She says that her daughter has been obsessed with having children her whole life; and, at some point received counseling for that obsession. 

     Nadya’s mother is saying that she is leaving.  So, that must be hard for her to even think about…but by staying would that be considered enabling her daughter or supporting her?  At this point, the babies are already here…they have been born.  The mother says that Nadya is out of embryos so that her obsession will have to end.   I think that is a good thing. 

         The question is…if Nadya truly has an obsession…why wasn’t that dealt with before this latest pregnancy?   Will the department of human services get involved to ensure that all 14 children are being cared for properly?  Will a social worker be assigned to the family to co-ordinate some kind of system to make sure that everyone is doing what needs to be done to support this family?  Who will pay for that since Nadya doesn’t work and her parents have filed for bankruptsy within the last couple of years?  The state of California, where she lives, certainly can’t afford to pay for that. 

         The medical expenses alone for this pregnancy will be astronomical.  Babies born prematurely will have huge medical bills from the birth and caregiving alone…not to mention possible life-long disabilities that they could face.  I heard, dont know if it is fact, that one of the older children has possible autistic tendencies.  That too, would be a big financial concern.

         All 14 children were allegedly fathered by the same sperm donor.  Does he bare any legal, financial, or moral responsibility?  Do you think he knows about the children…or do you think it is an annoymous sperm donor?  If he knows about the children…should he be legally forced to help provide physical and financial support?

          News programs were speaking today about the possibility of Nadya selling her “story” to Oprah’s show or maybe even Diane Sawyer for ABC news for something like $2million dollars.  Do you think that is appropriate or inappropriate?

           I at first thought…that is not cool.  She should have to work to provide for those children herself.  But then, reality set in…child care fees alone would take every penny that she makes; and she would still be a drain to the tax payers.  Not to mention…who in their right mind would take the responsibility of providing care for 14 children, all at once?  Another thing, if she was working round the clock to provide for them…she wouldn’t have any time to dedicate to the emotional needs of her children.  If she can’t make money from her “story” then…she would just be another single mother who supported her children from the money the rest of us tax payers pay in…and that is definately not ok with me. 

         As much as I dont like the idea of selling her story to the highest bidder…it is the lessor of two evils.  I dont think the American public (or California tax payers) should foot the financial or medical bills of that family.   Children are a blessing…i do believe in pro-life values.  However, this was a definate abuse of  the system to create a family.  Not the invitro itself…because i think that does provide an avenue for many families who have trouble conceiving children.  However, she already had children…she was not supporting them herself.  That was already a drain on her family and the tax payers assumably.  I do think it was unethical of whatever medical clinic that provided it’s fertility services to her, in her situation. 

         But, on the other hand, once they did enable her to conceive…I heard that she was offered selective termination of some of the fetuses to offer them a better chance of being born without difficulties.  I am glad that she did not terminate any of the babies…because i believe that is murder.  It is a terrible no win situation…but , life is life…and whatever she is able to do to legally support those children should be done.

         I do think if she is indeed offered a large sum of money…she should be court ordered to repay the tax payers for any support or monies that she/her family has received from the tax payers as no one else had the choice about how many children she chose to bring into the world.  I truly would be surprised if some reform or investigation is not performed to question the medical and legal ethics of this situation.  What are your thoughts on this story?

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Personal Responsibilities-Who And What Are You Responsible For?

     Do you ever wonder what your personal responsibilities are?  I mean, most people understand that they must work, take care of their children, nuture their personal relationships, and pay their bills; what else is there?  Being a responsible person is a way of life; are you required to take care of others outside the close personal limits of your immediate family?  Who and what are you responsible for?  Are there limits to your responsibilty legally, physically, spiritually, emotionally or morally? 

      Have you ever heard the saying, “Are you your brother’s keeper”?  Human beings are complex creatures.  We have layers of self, one upon the other…each with their own wants and needs.  For those who are spiritual seekers of truth; there are teachings which encourage us to reach beyond the demands of our own personal flesh-n- blood, wants and needs.  My road map is the Bible.  Everything i need to know to be a successful and fulfilled person is included in that instruction manual.

       God wants us to follow his leading; we are to grow and learn how to praise him and serve others.  This is not always convienent in today’s society,  according to the world’s values. That attitude of becoming a servant requires a bit of sacrifice on our part.  Many people run from their own responsibilities and refuse to accept that they have a moral responsibility to reach out to others.   And there are others who do not consider themselves spiritual beings who still manage to be service minded…realizing that there is value to connecting with and recognizing need in others. 

      Understand, I am not talking about enabling others to continue to be irresponsible…but instead, teaching and inspiring others to take up the challenge of  meeting their own obligations when they are able.   To do that, they must be inspired, they must have knowledge, skills, opportunities and funding…once that happens, they too can become a servant to pass it on to others.

        Responsibility is something that we must strive for.  When everything is going smoothly…it is because we have acknowledged our responsibilities and have submitted ourselves to the service of God. 

        God says that we are to take care of the widows and the children; we are to befriend the poor.  When we see suffering in the world and we have the ability, the skill, the opportunity to help ,then we must consider it a priviledge and a responsibility to do so.  What are you willing to do for those around you?  Do you know someone who has a need? Can you listen when someone needs to talk, can you spend time with someone who is lonely, are you capable of performing a chore that someone else cant do and needs done? 

      There are so many ways to be of service to another fellow human being…it is simply a matter of being aware and observing those around you and being willing to be helpful.  People in need are all around us…it will change your life to see the world through the eye and heart of a servant of God.

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Virginity For Sale-That’s Not Innocence

      I recently read a story about a young woman in San Diego; I won’t mention her name, as i really don’t want to give her any more notoriety than she has already created for herself.   Not to mention, I personally hope that she changes her mind about her decision to sell her virginity to the highest bidder. 

      For whenever a product is sold…there is a give and take; and while it may seem that the money is worth the loss of something that she values less than the money…it doesn’t mean that the trade of her integrity is the right thing to do.  Integrity is a core value in a person.  It is the state of being whole or undiminished; of adherring to moral or ethical principals; of honesty.  While she may be honest in her expectations of the deal…it does deminish the perception of who she is that she could or would sell herself to a person who would basically rent her body.  How will a future mate value her “virtue” if she herself devalues it?

      This 22 year old woman has received a bid for 3.7 million dollars for the one time gift of her virginity.  She allegedly got the idea to sell “it” after her sister allegedly prostituted herself for 3 months to pay for her college education.  Wow…is this like a family tradition or what?  I am sorry but, I am thinking this whole thing is wrong on so many levels.

        First off, the idea of selling your virginity is not my idea of innocence.  Evidently, it isn’t the dictionary’s idea of innocence either.  The definition of innocence is:  the quality or state of being innocent;  freedom from sin or moral wrong;  simplicity or lack of guile;  naivete;  lack of knowledge or understanding; freedom from legal or specific wrong; or, harmlessness.

       This young woman may have a lack of sexual experience…however, she is not innocent or “unknowing”.  She does understand what she is about to do.  She knows that she is selling a “product-herself” for a large sum of money.  She appears to understand that there are some people in this world who are willing to possess that “physical innocence” for a sum of money…even though that innocence is fleeting.  The logic of paying mutiple millions of dollars for something this empty escapes me…I can’t help but to ponder, what type of person would consider something of this nature. 

      She allegedly said that she believes that both herself and the person that she does “it” with will both profit greatly from the deal.  For herself, she plans to use some of the money to pay for an advanced degree in family and marriage therapy.  Hmmmmm…interesting!  Personally, I think it brings a whole new meaning to the idea of a profit/loss statement.   

       I wonder if she may someday have to use some of that money to pay for counseling once she takes that step into a marriage of her own…when both she and her future spouse have to come to terms with the physical and/or, psychological consequences of her actions regarding her virginity.  Money is a poor balm to a mind and a soul that is damaged from selling itself to the highest bidder.  Will she be able to trust that the person she chooses to marry is marrying her for herself and not for her money?  Will she be able to find a person to love her, who can find kernels of a person of value…after she devalues herself, as a person, by selling her body? 

       After all, this isn’t a person who is being forced to sell herself…nor is she selling herself to “survive”; she is making a conscious choice to sell her body for money.  When it is over, will she consider that she traded up?

       Back to the definitions of innocence…freedom from sin or moral wrong (decay)…while some may try to deny that selling your body is wrong morally…the soul knows it’s worth.  That is what a conscience is for.  It gets troubled and disturbed when you do things that go against spiritual purity.  That is a safety valve built within our very beings…it is designed by God to help us turn away from the very choices that have the ability to destroy us for eternity.  That is my opinion.

       Now, most anyone over the age of 10 understands about the exposure to STD’s from having sex with multiple partners.  This woman does not pretend to have a future with the person who will use her for this sexual experience.  That means that someday, she will eventually have other experiences with someone.  She herself admits that she is using this unknown person, in my opinion, by alluding to the fact that she is in it for the money.   I think in her mind, it is a straight up exchange of money for the sexual pleasure of sharing this 1st sexual experience with her.   This decision could have lifelong impact on both her life and, that of this invisible person with excess money; not to mention…her future sexual partners and or, any children that she may have someday.   In my book…exchanging sexual favors for money is prostitution and is illegal in California, last I knew. 

      Not that people don’t get involved in prostitution…however, they do get arrested for it; prostitution is a crime!    What do you think of this situation?

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Spending Twenty Three Hours A Day With Yourself-Kwame Kilpatrick

      Spending twenty three hours a day with yourself, in jail…would lead most people to do some real introspective deep thinking about the reasons you find yourself sitting behind bars.  Especially for a person who had been living the high life as Mayor of Detroit; it is a big lifestyle adjustment.  Kwame Kilpatrick will have just such an opportunity to do some of that self examination.  Yesterday, Mr. Kilpatrick began to serve a 120 day sentence for a variety of offenses.  He lied to the court about a sexual relationship with his Chief of Staff, Christine Beatty, he lied about text messages to the court which confirmed the affair and he also got into a scuffle with officers trying to serve a subpoena.  There were several offenses that the mayor had been accused of.

       At least two of those offenses ended with him pleading guilty to obstruction of jutice & no contest to felonious assault.  He lied to the court…effectively tying the hands of the legal system, for most of the summer, by using his legal team to fight his removal from office.  Michigan’s Governor Granholm had to hold a hearing to forcibly remove him.  After that hearing he was heard to say, “You done set me up for a comeback”.  This arrogance and defiance moved the judge to sentence him to the full 120 day sentence; typically, a person who exhibits good behavior can shave approximately 20 days off of their sentence, not in Kilpatrick’s case.  The judge was clearly put out by the demeanor of the former mayor throughout this whole process.

        The thing is…if someone has been publically shamed by their private and professional behavior; and then, goes on to be legally chastized and still continues to mock and make light of the situation…you have to wonder if they have learned anything at all about how to conduct themselves appropriately.  Will spending this punnitive time in jail help Mr. Kilpatrick to re-evaluate the direction of his life? 

        The things that he has sacrificed by conducting his affair(s) and lying to the authorities and the court, thereby, possibly harming his relationship with his wife and children, having to give up his law license, as well as his freedom; should be counted as natural consequences for living outside the bounds of legal and moral responsibilities to those to whom he was supposed to be accountable to.  And yet, from reading accounts of yesterdays events…it sounds as though Mr. Kilpatrick mocked the prosecutors by saying things like, “I love you man” and asking them “How you doing?  Can’t even smile”?  This doesn’t bode well for learning from his mistakes. 

          Some people would say that his demeanor is encouraged by his supporters; such as those who observed the former mayor being led from the court room, who shouted encouragement to him such as “Be Strong, We got your back, We love you mayor”.  Will he have a political future when he is free to pursue such goals  Where is the accountability?

          After serving the 120 day sentence, Mr. Kilpatrick will also be on probation for 5 years, give up his law license, and repay the city of Detroit $1 million dollars.

         So I say, if you are going to spend 23 hours a day with someone…it might as well be someone you like alot.  Only 119 days to go, Mr. Kilpatrick.  The people that i truly feel sorry for is his wife and children.  I am sure they are suffering more than he is.  They have had to move out of their home, they have lost a large part of their financial support, and, they have to endure the publicity for their husband and father’s actions for a long time to come.  Should he be allowed to run for public office ever again with this legal black mark on his record?

        

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Slavery Exists Even Today

       Slavery exists even today; i know that that sounds like an inflammatory statement but it is true.  It is just not talked about in any kind of real, life changing way.  I read a book recently which opens up a whole new way of looking at the world.  It is rather frightening.  Slavery exists today in what is called, modern day slavery….human trafficking.  People are bought and sold all over the world…but, it is not a subject that has been addressed in the fullness that it needs to be; to face it and, attempt to overcome it.

        The book is called, A Crime So Monstrous; it was written by author Benjamin Skinner; published in 2008.  He has traveled to places around the globe to educate and inform the world of the human injustice that is perpetrated against those who are vulnerable, and can not fight back without help.  It is a moral call to action.  Once your eyes have been opened up to the extent of the evil that is human trafficking…you will never look at the world in the same way.  Children, women, men, young and old…it doesn’t matter…crimes against humanity should never be tolerated.

        So what is modern slavery-human trafficking?  It is the forced sale of human beings to be used and abused.  There are many forms of it…from sexual slavery, prostitution, forced labor, to forced child marriages and the list goes on.  There are very real networks that cross continents buying and selling humans against their will; it impacts well over 800,000 individuals a year.   Sometimes repeatedly; without concern for the well-being of those who are being transferred like a piece of property.  It is illegal, it is immoral and it doesn’t stop there…sometimes, in many cases it is multi-generational.  In those cases, debt forces multiple generations to work to pay off debts…doing hard labor, with little or no pay.  In conditions not suitable for proper human living conditions.  Often, violence is used to coerce people to do things against their will.  They do not get proper food, shelter, health care or healthy human interaction.  It is not right.  Many of the victims are the most vulnerable in society…the weak, the poor, the disabled, the homeless, and those who are without protectors.

        Do you think it doesn’t affect you?   What if it was happening in your town?  What if it was in your neighborhood?   What if one of your loved ones came up missing?   Missing family member…what if they have become one of the invisible slaves bought and sold for someone else’s gain and pleasure?  People who patronize the prostitutes on any street, in any country, around the world did you ever wonder if …are they doing it because they want to?  Or, are they being forced to perform as a prostitute because they are in fact, someone’s slave?  If you purchase their services…you could be part of the problem. How about people who purchase the servant to cook, or clean in their business or home, especially those  individuals not legally present in that country; are they working for them willingly, or have they been bought and paid for?  

         Our country, the United States of America, is involved in war.  Our military men and women have seen things in other countries that would shock you.  In some of those countries, when war breaks out…rape is used as a tool to destroy cultures and to break down the resistance of the opposing fighters.   Our military men and women have seen what happens to the women in those countries that have been warring with one another when they have gone in to establish some kind of peace-keeping.  Women and children, as well as men, are raped and used horribly.  Some of them never recover, physically or emotionally.   This is unacceptable behavior…no matter what country it takes place in.  These are issues to think about.  No-one is guaranteed safety from these predators.  http://www.humantrafficking.org/updates  This is a global issue.  It affects us all.  If you met one of these individuals in person… how you could be unaffected?  Yet most of us live our lives unaware of their plight.  Their stories of abuse would horrify you. 

         Many of the hotbeds in the modern day slavery networks, are on the news everyday…either they are points of travel destinations, or glamour spots that the rich and famous travel to and from…others are known for their sexual tourism…PLEASE STOP FEEDING THE MONEY MACHINE.   Someone’s “tourism” is someone else’s nightmare!!!   Do some research…don’t travel or support countries that are known for trading the services of human beings, illegally, for money.  Governmental leaders must take a stand and enforce those who would disregard the value of human lives by their inaction.  We must expect legal consequences and demand it from the authorities who can make a difference.

         Ben Skinner’s book, A Crime So Monstrous, touches on some of those people and their situations.  It breaks your heart.  And yet, you know that it is just a way of outlinning the scope of the problem.  You can find out more about the book here:  www.simonsays.com  It is also available as an e-book.  Take the time to educate yourself…read it; and, understand how this affects us all.  We need to stand up and demand that our leaders help to wage a war against those who would commit crimes against humanity in such a vile, and dehumanizing way.  Thank you to those who fight the fight against such inhumanity in our world.  

See possibly related story:  http://abcnews.go.com/TheLaw/WireStory?id=6081857&page=1 or http://abcnews.go.com/TheLaw/story?id=6121646

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25 Years To Think-Lou Pearlman-Scam Artist

        Many people may not know who Lou Pearlman is; but, they certainly know about some of the big names he has represented as a music producer.  Lou Pearlman was just sentenced for 25 years in federal prison on four charges.  He has been convicted on charges of  money laundering, conspiracy, and using false statements in bankruptcy court proceedings.

        Going back 10 to 15 years he has allegedly falsified documents; and, employed financial scams that have stolen many people’s finances.  He was touted as a musical producer, of genius status, when he created industry buzz behind bands such as N’Sync, Backstreet Boys, and many other “boy” bands in the midst of the frenzy of such musical groups.  At one time, he even developed a television show for ABC called, The Making Of The Band; that show was capitalizing on the hopes and dreams of those with musical talent.

         He based his lavish life-style on money that was allegedly scammed from other “false” businesses that he claimed to own or have invested in.  Some of them never existed.  There were even long-time employees and acquaintances who’s lives were devastated by his actions.  One man even allegedly took his own life when his true financial reality was revealed. 

       Lou evidently had the ability to “motivate or induce” people to invest their hard earned money in his ideas and business plans.  He was very convincing; this had the devastating effect of plunging many people into despair when they discovered that they had nothing to show for their investments.  The ruthlessness here is hard to understand.

        After his financial misdeeds were documented…some other legal and moral allegations came to light.  He took off and disappeared for quite some time out of country; trying to avoid the legal ramifications here in the US.  He was spotted, photographed, subsequently arrested; and, returned to the United States.

       He was quietly accused of “inappropriate” actions with some of those young men in his groups and other potential musical hopefuls.  Unfortunately, Lou Pearlman’s perceived power was intimidating.  He used that to coerce or intimidated people to backdown legally when they would notify him that he was going to be challenged.  At the heighth of his power, he held a lot of sway in the industry;  people did not follow through on legal action out of fear of retaliation personally and professionally. 

        It was alledged that some of those, for whom Lou Pearlman represented or were hopeful of his representation, “allowed” themselves to be used in an inappropriate way in exchange for representation.  Children can not give consent; that is sexual abuse.  Sexual concerns were whispered about in relation to Lou Pearlman and young men. 

          If any of those allegations are true…Mr. Pearlman will have about 25 years to reflect on how his actions have affected those around him during that time in his life when he held all of the power; the balance of power has now shifted.  Hopefully, that will bring some justice to those he has hurt.

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