I Have Moved…Come and See Me

       You may have noticed that I haven’t posted here in a few days…I have moved; that is my big news.   I sure would love it if you would come and see me at my new environment.  It will look familiar to you, it will still feel comfortable and yet, because change is change…it will be a little bit different.  I will still write about all that is going on in the world, my observations and opinions.  I had to move and expand my wings.    Come and see me anyway; relationships are no fun when it is only one -sided…if i write…who will read?  http://www.writewhereyouareblog.com  I miss your company and your comments on my blog!!!

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Struggling With Guilt-Yours, Mine, And Others

      When someone struggles with guilt in a needless way…it can be devastating.  I had a brief conversation with someone who was struggling with it…as she said, her guilt, other people’s guilt; and, she said she needed to let it go; because she worried too much about what other people thought.

      You see, guilt is simply a tool.  One that our subconscious mind uses to help us make good choices in our lives; it is like an early warning detection system.   Guilt tells us we are making a wrong choice.   But like anything, guilt can be misplaced.  Instead of building us up and helping us to build a strong positive character; sometimes guilt runs amok, and instead creates self-doubt, tearing down our self-esteem and helps to destroy the foundation , of who we are as a person. 

        This must be dealt with or a person who struggles with needless guilt, or a disporportionate amount of guilt to any given situation, begins to devalue their own opinions and strengths and begins to give more weight and credibility to those around them.

       I told her she needed to value herself as much as she valued the opinions of others.  It was a simple statement.  She simply needed to worry as much about what she thought of herself as she did about what others thought of her.  You see, when you look in the mirror (or examine your own heart and mind) you have to like who you see; you have to respect yourself.    Later, she said she was better.  I was glad…because she is a person who comes across as a very caring person…a person who does alot for others…and who reaches out.

      Why is it that we are so quick to judge ourselves harshly and so quick to give the benefit of doubt to others?  Each of us does this to some degree.  We have negative thought patterns that we fall victim to…that little negative voice inside our heads; our own personal form of self-doubt.    We must learn to appreciate ourselves in ways that matter.  After all, if we dont value ourselves enough…no one else will either!

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Virginity For Sale-That’s Not Innocence

      I recently read a story about a young woman in San Diego; I won’t mention her name, as i really don’t want to give her any more notoriety than she has already created for herself.   Not to mention, I personally hope that she changes her mind about her decision to sell her virginity to the highest bidder. 

      For whenever a product is sold…there is a give and take; and while it may seem that the money is worth the loss of something that she values less than the money…it doesn’t mean that the trade of her integrity is the right thing to do.  Integrity is a core value in a person.  It is the state of being whole or undiminished; of adherring to moral or ethical principals; of honesty.  While she may be honest in her expectations of the deal…it does deminish the perception of who she is that she could or would sell herself to a person who would basically rent her body.  How will a future mate value her “virtue” if she herself devalues it?

      This 22 year old woman has received a bid for 3.7 million dollars for the one time gift of her virginity.  She allegedly got the idea to sell “it” after her sister allegedly prostituted herself for 3 months to pay for her college education.  Wow…is this like a family tradition or what?  I am sorry but, I am thinking this whole thing is wrong on so many levels.

        First off, the idea of selling your virginity is not my idea of innocence.  Evidently, it isn’t the dictionary’s idea of innocence either.  The definition of innocence is:  the quality or state of being innocent;  freedom from sin or moral wrong;  simplicity or lack of guile;  naivete;  lack of knowledge or understanding; freedom from legal or specific wrong; or, harmlessness.

       This young woman may have a lack of sexual experience…however, she is not innocent or “unknowing”.  She does understand what she is about to do.  She knows that she is selling a “product-herself” for a large sum of money.  She appears to understand that there are some people in this world who are willing to possess that “physical innocence” for a sum of money…even though that innocence is fleeting.  The logic of paying mutiple millions of dollars for something this empty escapes me…I can’t help but to ponder, what type of person would consider something of this nature. 

      She allegedly said that she believes that both herself and the person that she does “it” with will both profit greatly from the deal.  For herself, she plans to use some of the money to pay for an advanced degree in family and marriage therapy.  Hmmmmm…interesting!  Personally, I think it brings a whole new meaning to the idea of a profit/loss statement.   

       I wonder if she may someday have to use some of that money to pay for counseling once she takes that step into a marriage of her own…when both she and her future spouse have to come to terms with the physical and/or, psychological consequences of her actions regarding her virginity.  Money is a poor balm to a mind and a soul that is damaged from selling itself to the highest bidder.  Will she be able to trust that the person she chooses to marry is marrying her for herself and not for her money?  Will she be able to find a person to love her, who can find kernels of a person of value…after she devalues herself, as a person, by selling her body? 

       After all, this isn’t a person who is being forced to sell herself…nor is she selling herself to “survive”; she is making a conscious choice to sell her body for money.  When it is over, will she consider that she traded up?

       Back to the definitions of innocence…freedom from sin or moral wrong (decay)…while some may try to deny that selling your body is wrong morally…the soul knows it’s worth.  That is what a conscience is for.  It gets troubled and disturbed when you do things that go against spiritual purity.  That is a safety valve built within our very beings…it is designed by God to help us turn away from the very choices that have the ability to destroy us for eternity.  That is my opinion.

       Now, most anyone over the age of 10 understands about the exposure to STD’s from having sex with multiple partners.  This woman does not pretend to have a future with the person who will use her for this sexual experience.  That means that someday, she will eventually have other experiences with someone.  She herself admits that she is using this unknown person, in my opinion, by alluding to the fact that she is in it for the money.   I think in her mind, it is a straight up exchange of money for the sexual pleasure of sharing this 1st sexual experience with her.   This decision could have lifelong impact on both her life and, that of this invisible person with excess money; not to mention…her future sexual partners and or, any children that she may have someday.   In my book…exchanging sexual favors for money is prostitution and is illegal in California, last I knew. 

      Not that people don’t get involved in prostitution…however, they do get arrested for it; prostitution is a crime!    What do you think of this situation?

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Traffic Jam

        Who hates getting stuck in a traffic jam?  Yeah, me too…unless it is with my blog; then, i absolutely love, love, love traffic.  I am thrilled to be to say, that with the next 10 visitors; I will have had 56,000 visitors to this blog in exactly 15 months (minus two days)  🙂   That is totally cool!  Now, if only I was a marketer and had something to sell…hmmm…i could be fairly well up to my eyeballs with nickels and dimes, don’t ya think?  Too funny, as I have no business interest, other than writing that is.

         Anyway…i was just so excited to share this very important update,  lol…that i couldn’t wait for those last ten visitors to appear.  I remember just a few short weeks ago, announcing on a teleseminar with Michael Penland, that i was about to hit 51,000 visitors; and, that was on August 30th–that is only 6 short weeks ago!!!  https://writeasrain.wordpress.com/2008/08/30/doing-something-new-is-scary/

        Wow, that’s 5,000 visitors in six weeks.  Every new blogging milestone far out-distances any goals that i have ever set for myself.  Imagine what an individual could do when they go about setting their sights on a goal with determination to achieve it!!!   Mind blowing to a girl who’s only goal was to set about being disciplined and writing every day; when possible…and trying to document the world as i observe it, in my own way.  Maybe i need to raise my expectations for myself; set a new goal or accomplishment to achieve.   I will have to think on that…what do i need to focus on or do with my writing that is different? 

         I guess it just illustrates the need to connect…and communicate; human beings share so many things in common with one another.  We all have opinions on the things that go on around us; maybe you have something to write about that someone else wants or needs to hear?

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Fighting For The Right To Use Hurtful Words

      Talk about a intense flare up of a conversation.  This week on The View, a conversation took place that was shocking in it’s intensity between the races.  The show got onto the topic of conversation of using the “N” -word because of a conversation recorded between (Reverend and i use the term lightly here, only as a matter of clarifying which Jackson made the comment) Jesse Jackson and another person.   Jesse Jackson, Jr. was horrified that his father made such statements; and publicly chastised him for doing so. 

          In that conversation, Jesse Jackson made a couple of inappropriate comments regarding Barack Obama.

      It seems that Jesse Jackson takes issue with the way that Sen. Obama speaks to the African American population.  He said it made him want to rip off his n–s.  Then later, it was also revealed that he allegedly, also used the other “N”- word. 

       On the view, Elisabeth Hasselback made a comments saying, that she felt it was inappropriate to use that word in private or in public.  Wow, did the other “ladies” of the view take issue with her.

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