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Posts Tagged ‘control’

A new interview with Billy Ray Cyrus is making the news, as a pensive Billy Ray rues that the show Hannah Montanna came into his family’s life.  He expresses that he feels that it has destroyed his family.  I think it is with good reasons that he has those regrets.  After all, in the last year his 18 year old daughter Miley Cyrus has made multiple headlines that have left many of her fans, and the parents of her fans, feel like she has left those roots of which she was so proud of before.  Those roots that spoke of family values and Christian beliefs.

Miley Cyrus became so rich and so overwhelmingly popular that she began to make changes like dressing more provocatively.   She not only “grew up”; she changed her image.   She made very grown up videos with older men and she was caught on film smoking Salvia in a bong (which is not illegal in California but which has hallucinogenic affects on the people who smoke it).   Billy says that he always tried to be a friend to his children and now he regrets not being more of a disciplinarian type of a parent. Many parents realize this type of mistake…but, when there are people who form a wall around your child, I would imagine it is harder to talk things out.   Billy didn’t have the title of being his daughter’s manager in business either…so he had no official say so in those business decisions of hers.  He feels that much of what has happened in recent months has been out of his control.  To continue reading click here:  Write Where You Are

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      This subject is never a pleasant one.  No one likes to acknowledge domestic abuse is a way of life…especially if it is happening within their own life.  Unfortunately, domestic abuse happens every day in a multitude of ways.  It doesn’t just happen in the lives of the poor, the rich, or the celebrity world; even though, that is often the stories that we hear about…those who are famous.  We must awaken to the facts of domestic abuse; it is often learned behaviors that are used to control another person…either with intimidation, physical violence, emotional abuse or sexual abuse.

       Domestic abuse is like cancer…it is constantly trying to destroy the people involved.  It is a pattern of behavior that affect both the abuser and the person being abused.  Many who are being abused do not recognize that what is happening in their lives is actually domestic abuse.  The reasons for their lack of understanding, or denial are many.  (more…)

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      Today, pictures that show the trauma that singer Rihanna  allegedly suffered at the hands of her boyfriend singer, Chris Brown were released.  If it is true that these are authentic police pictures; someone is going to lose their job.   It is awful that someone could profit from providing this picture to a media outlet…whether they profitted for fame, for money, or purely for the ability to be in control over the picture.  When it is discovered, through the internal police investigation, who the person is who released it…they will instantly become a very unpopular person.  It must take a tremendous amount of lack of compassion and integrity to give yourself permission to profit from someone else’s pain and misery!  (more…)

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       Donald Trump has resigned from the Trump Entertainment Resorts.  He allegedly says that if he can’t manage something, then it isn’t for him.  After he resigned from the board, the company filed a Chapter 11 bankruptsy protection proceeding…this is the third time that they have done that.

        Mr. Trump had allegedly wanted to buy the company and take it private; but, it appears that the bond holders chose not to go that route.  It must be frustrating to have a company that is known by your name, but, have very little control over their actual business decisions.  (more…)

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      Both Chris Brown and his girlfriend, Rihanna, were scheduled to be performers on the Grammy Awards show last night.  They did not show up.  Today, word comes out in news reports that Chris Brown is being accused of a domestic violence assault,  of an undeclared female who allegedly Id’ed him as the abuser; this is a felony, if convicted.

        It is alledged that Chris Brown and his girlfriend Rihanna were driving and got into an argument and stopped the vehicle.  Allegedly both exited the vehicle and continued the argument.  The argument became heated and someone placed an emergency call to 911.  When the police arrived they found the victim at the scene of the altercation.  Chris Brown had allegedly left the area.  The victim had visible injuries.

         Chris Brown has been booked for making criminal threats and it is alledged that there could be more charges filed in the future.  He posted a large amount of bail and was released.  The spokesperson for Rihanna did not confirm or deny reports…supposedly just expressed Rihanna’s well being, and thanked everyone for their concern.

          I remember for quite some time at the beginning of their relationship, it was kept hush- hush about the rumors of their romance.  Chris is only 19 years old and Rihanna is 20; if this domestic assault did indeed happen between these two, it is going to have long reaching consequences.  Domestic violence is a huge problem; it affects everyone, whether personally or through someone that they know.  It’s an issue that destroys many lives. 

         It doesn’t help that as public figures, both Chris and Rihanna, are viewed as role models.  Because of their fans, many will be watching this situation closely.   Of course there is concern for both party’s well-being; at the same time, how they handle this situation personally and professionlly, will be important. 

         Domestic violence can never be condoned.  Often times, drugs or alcohol play a part, as well as stress, anger issues, and financial strains.  Those are underlying causes for many instances of domestic violence; but, they should never be a justification for harming another person. 

         If this alledged assualt is swept under the rug by the PR machine, it will do a grave disservice to both men and women.   Teens and young adults, who are aware of this situation, will be learning from it.  What they learn will be determined by how it is handled by both Chris Brown and the victim…whoever she is.  The seriousness of it should not be spun by those trying to minimize the professional damage to the entertainers…it is more important to address the issues for both of them; they are so young and they have their whole lives ahead of them.  It would be wrong to allow this alledged incident to be downgraded to a misunderstanding if there truly was domestic violence.  None of us were there and know what really happened…hopefully, there will be healing for everyone involved.

         There are so many layers of emotions involved for family members, friends and the general public as well as those involved in a domestic dispute.  Counseling is helpful, support of family and friends who are informed and not enablers is crucial.  Getting professional help when dealing with these issues is a healthy way to work through them and prevent them from becoming a pattern in personal relationships; it may just save someone’s life.

          Often domestic violence is about power and control.  Those two issues are present in every relationship; how those issues are addressed is important they can be handled in a healthy way or they can be ignored allowing a dangerous situation to get out of control.    Domestic violence is being  abused,  used, overwhelmed,  intimidated, coerced, controlled or humiliated; that is when the balance of the relationship crosses over into dysfunction.   For anyone experiencing an abusive or dyfunctional relationship there is help available:  http://www.ndvh.org/ .  Please reach out for help, because often these thing get worse as time goes on.  No one wants to be in that situation…please get help before it is too late.

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       Breaking news of a horrific nature…Australia has been experiencing some terrible fires, overnight, that has caused major damage to some towns and at least 84 deaths.  Although that number may continue to climb as they gain control of the brush fires.   There are many who were hospitalized with burns and some of them may yet lose their lives because of their injuries.  This is the deadliest wildfire that Australia has ever had.  The areas that have been the most impacted were in the southeastern area of Australia; as well as  towns about 50 miles north and east of the capital, Melbourne.

         People have lost their homes, their livelihoods in some cases and many have lost their loved ones or their own lives.  Some people were killed in the fires as they tried to escape in their vehicles.  This is horrible; it is suspected that some of these fires were deliberately set.   If that is true; it is a crime, the murders of innocent people are on the hands of those who set these fires.  It is unfathamable why anyone would wish to do such harm.  The firefighters are bravely trying to fight the fires, which may take days to control.  I pray that God help the Australians by bringing some rain and helping the firefighters to gain control and help the people of Australia as they cope with their losses.

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       Breaking news today that the infamous Sam Lufti who is Britney Spears former manager is suing both Britney and both of her parents; he is claiming that they have defamed him and claiming breach of contract.   Going back to last year when Britney was having the worst year of her life…the news was peppered with comments of worry relating to Sam Lufti’s relationship with Britney. 

         Her parents were alledging that he had too much control over Britney and that he had allegedly confided in Britney’s mother Lynne that he gave her “medications”.   Britney was exhibiting behavior that had everyone concerned for her well-being and that of her children.   Britney’s father Jamie went to court and got legal control over Britney’s finances and business dealings; effectively removing anyone with suspected ulterior motives from unauthorized access to Brit’s money or to Britney herself.

        Sam Lufti is now claiming that Jamie and Lynne have combined efforts to lie about him and have used intimidation to remove him from Britney’s life.  I don’t think that the Spears’ have tried to hide the fact that they believe that Sam Lufti should have no contact with Britney; since they went to court to limit his contact with her.  They were very concerned about their daughter and did what they felt was best to protect her and guard her safety and emotional well-being.   Sam Lufti says he feels he had no choice but to file suit against them in their campaign to smear his name.   Britney, after being hospitalized twice and having her father take over conservatorship of her legal and business affairs has made a miraculous recovery.  She has regained the ability to visit with her children and to perform onstage before her fans with confidence, once again.

         Jamie Spears has again gone to the courts, recently, to file a restraining order because of what he says are attempts by Sam Lufti and others in regards to the   harassment of  the Spears family.  I would presume that they would have evidence to back up that claim, or he would not have gone through the inconvience and cost of going to the court to file charges.  

     The timing of this latest difficulty for the Spears family comes close to the beginning of Britney’s new tour which is scheduled to begin next month.  The tour promises to make lots of money and I would not be surprised if  Sam Lufti, as her former manager, feels that he would have been benefitting from the profits of such business dealings; if he had not been removed from contact with Britney Spears.

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